Mommy, WOW! I'm a big kid now.

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day!!  I'm home with Otter today since his daycare is closed.  It's nice.  I love being home with him. Which got me thinking back to this summer when I was home for three months looking for a job. I was miserable.  A combination of feeling unworthy of any job and feeling like I wasn't contributing to the family as I should make it a really, really long three months. I am able to work, so why wouldn't I work?- That is rhetorical, I don't really need or want to hear why I should be staying home. But, now, there are days where I just want to be home and I love being home when I get the chance.  I wish I could find a perfect medium.  Maybe where I could work from home 2-3 days a week and at the office the other days.  It's the going to work that makes me realize that I love both and would like a better balance.  I'm not sure if I'll ever find a job that will let me do both.  Definitely not during Otter's toddler days.  However, he is learning so much at daycare and the socialization is doing really well. 

Speaking of learning things, Otter is pretty much potty trained.  Except number two...if you know what I mean. It all started when he saw some other kids at daycare using the potty and being able to join the potty parade. Then, I picked him up one day and he was covered in stickers for each time he used the potty.  He was still wearing diapers at that time. After a few days of that and having no luck getting him to use the potty at home, his teacher and I decided to start sending him in underwear.  He had a few days of accidents and then all of the sudden no accidents all.  But he was still having troubles at home.  Mainly because we'd get home in the evenings and I'd start cooking dinner and he'd start chugging milk/water and playing and doing his chores.  We'd all get side-tracked because this was new to us all.  But after a few days he stopped having accidents in the evening.  So, he only wears diapers to bed at night and for naps.  We are still working on "poopies".  But I am dang proud.  It wasn't and painful or drawn out as I had fears.  Seriously, I was dreading it and putting it off.  But, it is, yet, another reminder that my little guy isn't so "little" anymore.

For anyone who is about to undertake the potty training adventure, I found that stickers are a greats (and cheap) motivator/reward. Also, for the days that we are completely accident free, he is able to pick a reward out of the reward basket.  It is filled with goodies from the Dollar Spot from Target!  Take your little guy or gal to the potty every 20-30 minutes whether they thing they have to go or not. We use the potty seats that fit right onto the actual toilet. A step-stool is good for those "I can do it!" kiddos. And not to mention, the though of cleaning a portable potty seat makes me want to puke.  Isn't that why I am transitioning away from diapers?

Do you have successful potty training tips you'd like to share? Questions or difficulties? Share them!

FOMO

It's really nice to have a weekend of doing nothing. Really, really nice. We celebrated Doc's birthday but other than that we had no obligations or commitments. Otter and I ran some errands on Saturday and then we came home and took down all of the Christmas decorations. I even decided I wanted to watch a movie that I have wanted to watch. So, I rented Trouble with the Curve. I enjoyed it. Mainly because I was in my pajamas in my own bed with Otter surrounded by air popped popcorn, banana chips, gold fish, pistachios, and diet coke. But, in all seriousness, it was yet another feel good movie. I love Amy Adams and won't turn down Justin Timberlake, either.

On Sunday, Doc headed into work for a little bit and Otter and I just hung out at home. We watched a few too many movies and built our first snow man that Otter named "Me". As twilight approached, Otter started to become concerned about "Me" asking if he was okay and if he would go to sleep. What a sweet boy.

Although I love spending time with my boy, I can't leave the room with out him freaking out. It doesn't always seem like he is screaming for me, but rather because he is being "left out". This kid is definitely my kid. Like me, he seems to have a mild case of FOMO (fear of missing out). I have never been a particularly popular person, especially in high school, but I always need to know what is going on. Not because I am necessarily nosey but because I don't want to miss out on something. My mom and step-dad even affectionately called me "Radar" for a while. I just want to be included in everything. Perhaps this is because I wasn't popular or maybe it is because I had two older step-sisters who were close to me in age but old enough to do things I couldn't, at the same time. It doesn't matter why, but I have this personality trait that makes me want to know and be involved. As I have gotten older I have learned to manage this feeling but I am not always successful. I really hope Otter doesn't grow up feeling this way. Hopefully some of his father's characteristics rub off ans his is the perfect mix of social and antisocial.  I make sure that when it is appropriate to include him he is included.  I also explain to him when he's not included why and what he can do instead. For example when the neighbors are outside playing with their guests, Otter wants to go over.  I explain that they are playing with their friends right now and that he hasn't been asked to come over.  He's not allowed to invite himself, but instead, we can go do ______ together. I hope it works. With all of the technology we currently have and the technology his generation will likely have they will be connected all of the time and the FOMO will only intesify. We don't need a million Scott Disicks running around.

It's Twenty Thirteen!

Well, I took a little hiatus.  I was working on something and then the Sandy Hook tragedy happened and what I was working on felt meaningless. Then, I decided I would write my thoughts and feelings on that.  But I couldn’t.  It hurt too damn bad to acknowledge that someone could be that cold. Instead, I hand wrote a letter to my son. Maybe I’ll post that someday.

So, now, it is the second day of Twenty Thirteen and I didn’t make a New Year’s resolution. We didn’t even “celebrate” the New Year. We got home from our trip to the Midwest visiting our family on New Year’s Eve. After hauling everything out of the vehicle and into the house, Christmas had officially thrown up all over the kitchen- where everything was dumped.  I had to run to the local market to get milk and essentials and I saw a sign on the door that said they were closing at 6:00 pm.  WHY?! Oh, yeah, it’s that holiday that I haven’t celebrated for years.

I don’t know why I don’t celebrate. Perhaps it’s that I was a waitress and by the time I got off work it was too late to do anything which slowly evolved to sitting on the couch in pajamas and watching the ball drop at home, to having a baby and not being able to physically keep myself awake long enough to even find a station what was broadcasting the events, to life has taken over and I just don’t care anymore. For whatever reason, I don’t stay up late, drinking and partying. I wake up the next morning, life as normal, and head to Target for groceries before many people have even gotten a few hours of sleep. Which is fine.

On this second day of the New Year comes the realization that the “holidays” are over for the next 11-ish months. Well, 10 because I feel like Halloween should really be included since it is less than a month before Thanksgiving, but I’m sure people would throw a fit- haters gonna hate, right?! Otter had a lovely Christmas.  His Nana sure did spoil him rotten.  I guess that’s a benefit of being the only grandchild. Otter, Doc, and I spent a lot of time in the car together. And Chip went back to the North Pole. Otter was surprisingly okay with this.  His 7 and 8 year-old cousins, however, did not appreciate it as much.  Maybe it was because they only got to see the Elf for a few days. But, I loved spending the time with family and reconnecting.  I wish we could do it more often.  I never thought I would be the one living across the country from everyone I know and love.  But I (we) are and it’s alright.  It’s a feeling of independence that I love.  We three are in this together and we have each other to lean on.

I will work on preparing a post of all of Chip’s shenanigans.  I have to admit that I lost steam towards the end of the season.

Here’s to a Happy and Healthy New Year!